Yet Another Rambling Post

I have the urge to write and nothing is coming. Beyond this self-annhilating dissatisfaction though, life is bearable. I mean, as bearable as desolated life can be. Lately I just feel so... I don't know... partitioned? I feel as though I am composed of mirror shards - all of which are reflective of me, but each displaying a slightly skewed angle. I like my hair today though, and that always helps (sadly enough).
The feeling has been slow-coming this time around though. It oscillates, a strangely graphic rendering of a seemingly intangible thing. I think two events today quickened its late appearance though: 1) I was an idiot around someone I look up to and 2) I was, yet again, an idiot around another person I look up to. The first was a peer, the second, a professor. I was simply stupid, there's not much more to it. It's not a good feeling. But I suppose it happens, and I'd better get used to it.